The Dastardly Dragon Killer and the Poisoned Breath
The Dastardly Dragon Killer and the Poisoned Breath
A Point Muse Cozy Paranormal Mystery. Book Two
Kelly Ethan
Copyright © 2020 by Kelly Ethan
All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
Publisher’s Note: This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are a product of the author’s imagination. Locales and public names are sometimes used for atmospheric purposes. Any resemblance to actual people, living or dead, or to businesses, companies, events, institutions, or locales is completely coincidental.
Contents
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
About the Author
Also by Kelly Ethan
The Murderous Monster and the Stony Gaze
The Cruel Crow and the Deadly Hex.
To the usual suspects who help make my stories better and to my ARC Team who have eagle eyes for typos. You rock!
The Dastardly Dragon Killer and the Poisoned Breath
Book Two
There’s a murder in the art gallery, a dragon slayer on the loose and a nosy librarian turned sleuth.
Let the mayhem begin…
Xandie Meyers thought she’d found her place in the supernatural world when she moved to Point Muse, Maine. She even made new friends in the form of one Priss Makepeace. But instead of settling into a peaceful new life, Xandie’s dealing with rampaging zombie gnomes, bad luck, and now a poisoned dragon body has turned up in the art gallery.
The Dragon clan is snarling for vengeance and her new friend is the prime suspect.
Xandie has no choice but to let Sherlock librarian swing into action before an innocent woman is jailed for a crime she didn’t commit and Point Muse dissolves into chaos.
Can Xandie survive long enough to navigate her freaky new world? Or will things that go bump in the night have her for a midnight snack?
If you like snarky dialogue, murder and mayhem then you’ll love the next installment in Kelly Ethan’s Point Muse Mysteries, a new cozy paranormal mystery series.
Unlock the mayhem of The Dastardly Dragon Killer and the Poisoned Breath!
One
“Who’d have thought ceramic garden gnomes craved blood?” Alexandra Meyers, a.k.a. Xandie, squealed when a nasty-looking gnome with a sharp fishing pole bared his teeth. She panted, her stomach a wibbly wobbly bowl full of jelly. Her attackers had such cute faces, all red-cheeked and wide grins, but hid a sadistic Xandie-biting streak a mile wide.
“Well, sweetie, there're rumors on the dark witch web about a breed of cursed gnomes.” Elspeth lined up her crutch and let loose with a sharp underarm sweep. “Bonsai,” she cackled as a sneering miniature female with an apron, red cheeks and a tiny sharp knife exploded into white dust.
“You want to talk about rumors when zombie gnomes are stalking us?” Xandie climbed up on the base of one of the lampposts lining Main Street. Her grandmother, Elspeth Harrow, had a somewhat dubious and mysterious past. Xandie had only known her for the last few months. The woman was a wildcard with a devious streak a mile wide, but her aim was spot on. Her grandmother had sprained her ankle racing carts with the clothing optional octogenarian coven in town. So, the wild streak had its downside. Xandie winced when a gash on her ankle pulled tight with a sharp twang. Arms quivering, she adjusted her hands around the lamppost. Maybe it was time to try out for weight training. The burn in her muscles flared red hot the more she thought about letting go.
“There is always time for rumors, Xandie. You’re a Harrow, it’s in your blood.”
“My father would argue it’s Meyers’ blood, not Harrow,” Xandie offered with a grimace. Her father hated Point Muse, his hometown. He’d grown up surrounded by the weird and wacky characters that populated the small Maine town. Then he’d met her mother, Miranda Harrow, and he’d convinced her to move to Andrews, a college town outside of Portland. Three and half hours away from Point Muse. Not far enough if you asked her father. He still hadn’t forgiven his only daughter for moving and becoming the librarian to the supernatural Great Library of Alexandria. Xandie shuffled her feet on the base of the lamppost, easing the tingling in her toes now.
“Huh, I guess Nicholas Meyers is the expert then.” Elspeth swung her crutch again, taking the head off a rosy-cheeked statue with teeth filed into sharp points. “The rumors don’t matter, anyway. These gnomes are from my collection.”
“The mysterious Elspeth Harrow collects ceramic blood-hungry garden ornaments?”
“Everyone has a hobby. Mine’s cursed statues. Someone stole my head statue. Went out this morning and she was missing, and the rest only listen to her. That’s why we have a bloodthirsty gaggle of gnomes.” Elspeth jabbed her crutch down on a red-capped gnome nibbling on her bandaged ankle.
Even her grandmother was spryer than she was. Taking action, Xandie swung a leg and karate-kicked a hungry milkmaid. Score. “Lila isn’t due to open for another ten minutes and they have us pinned down. What’s our next move?” Before she fainted from excess exercise.
“The next move is to eliminate these ornaments before they take us out, dear.”
“Cursed gnomes. What else can Point Muse shock me with?” At least Theo stayed in the library with his pet imp, Horatio. He’d wanted to practice riding techniques. Her aunt, Amelia, had even made a tiny saddle for the imp. Her vet-witch aunt had proclaimed Theo, Xandie’s ancient Greek teenager turned cranky black cat guardian, would benefit from caring for a pet. Even if the pet was a demonic denizen of Hell. Elspeth had given her stamp of approval by gifting a tiny hot-pink tracksuit with impish bedazzled on the pants. Horatio loved his clothing and paraded on Theo’s back, wiggling his pink tracksuit bottom in pride. Since the imp helped defend the cat from a killer knight, he’d been a fixture in the house.
“On your left,” a female voice bellowed from behind Xandie.
Xandie’s breathing suspended for a split second, before whooshing out in a gush as she whipped to the side to face her next attacker. The only thing she spotted were the scattered remains of her vicious ceramic stalkers. She shook her head. What the heck… “Where have they all gone?”
Elspeth still swung away at her pile of remains so where were the rest?
“Duck.”
Without thought, she dropped straight down. Crouching on the concrete base of the lamppost, she held on tight. A sword whistled overhead and a rope with ninja gnomes attached crashed to the ground in a spray of white dust. Coughing, Xandie stepped down from the lamppost and wiped her eyes. “Thanks, whoever you are. Your aim was true and noble in the slaying of blood-hungry cursed garden ceramics.”
Throat dry from the battle and the shock ending, she licked ceramic ash from her lips. She struggled to find the words to thank her rescuer but came up short. How did you say thanks to someone who sliced rabid garden gnomes out for blood? More to the point, how did you explain the said evil doers?
“This town is a hoot. Crazy, but still a hoot. I’m Priss Makepeace, at your s
laying service.” A tall athletic woman with blonde hair and a bouncy ponytail grinned down at Xandie.
“A hoot, yeah. Try saying that after those damn garden ornaments stab you in the ankle multiple times.”
“Is this normal for Point Muse?”
“Eh…” Xandie rolled her eyes then smiled. “I’m Xandie Meyers. Your assist arrived just in time.” Her savior towered over her own five-foot-five height, handy when you needed garden gnome slaying. Xandie loved her sugar too much to give it up in favor of exercise, especially sword related, which meant she was well padded in certain areas. Unlike the slim and muscled woman in front of her.
“My pleasure. Like I said, you can use my slaying skills anytime.” Priss shook the dust from her sword and glanced at Xandie’s companion.
Xandie followed her gaze, concerned for Elspeth. But her grandmother had decimated her foes and cradled a snapping fishing gnome before twisting his head off.
“You good, Elspeth?” Never underestimate the upper arm strength of a reformed dark witch octogenarian.
Elspeth dusted her hands off, grabbed her crutch and hobbled over to her granddaughter. “That’s a great cardio workout. Shame about my gnomes though.” Elspeth sighed and then shot a questioning glance from amber-colored Harrow eyes at Xandie’s blonde ceramic-slaying heroine.
“Priss Makepeace, champion with a sword.” Priss nodded at Elspeth and gestured with a sword-free hand. “So, is this a regular killing celebration? I arrived a few weeks ago and everything seemed quiet then.”
Elspeth narrowed her gaze. “And who are you?”
“I’m the temporary fill-in for the sports instructor at Point Muse Academy while the current teacher is on maternity leave.” Priss saluted carefully with her short sword. “I’m renting an apartment on Main Street. I was running through some sword training when I saw you attacked. Thought I’d come and help.”
“Thank God you did.” Xandie kicked the rope the gnomes had climbed down and shuddered when she spotted the rough noose fashioned at the top.
Flipping a switch from suspicious to welcoming, Elspeth patted Priss on her sword arm. “Thanks for helping my granddaughter.”
“I thought you might be related. You both have the same amber-colored eyes.”
“Family trait. Xandie’s not used to the cutthroat world of Point Muse yet. She’s a sheltered librarian.”
“Hey,” the sheltered librarian protested. “I’ve been here a couple months.”
“Most of it spent in jail or running away from knightly killers or stuffing your face with Lila’s butter puffs.” Elspeth poked Xandie’s rear end. “Add cardio to your library duties.”
Elspeth smirked and patted her hot-pink coiffed hairdo. “Right, I’m off to hunt down my last gnome. Some cretin stole her, and she’s a cursed Sumerian demon. I need to get her back. Tootles.” She waved to the girls and hobbled off toward Harrow House.
Xandie turned to her gnome slayer and surprised a flicker of regret on the stranger’s face. “You okay? The weird that is Point Muse isn’t for everyone.”
Priss shook herself like a wet dog. “Weird doesn’t disturb me. My father dabbled in the mystical security business while he raised me. I’ve seen enough to know that Point Muse is normal for a supernatural town.”
“Wizard or sorcerer?” Two or three months ago she’d never have been able to say that phrase without snorting or calling the crazy police.
“Magical security with enhanced weapons, hence the sword.” Priss sheathed her sword at her waist. “Your grandmother mentioned you’re a librarian?”
Xandie snorted. Librarian didn’t seem to cover her job description. “I’m the librarian, curator and general dogs-body to the library.”
Eyes rounded, Priss whistled. “The librarian, emphasis on the. My dad told me about the library. Guess I better stay on your good side.”
“Xandie doesn’t have a good side, it’s all downhill from here.” Lila stuck her head through her open bakery door. “Come in, brave gnome fighters. I have rich, gooey chocolate chip cookies as a reward.”
Thank God for her family and chocolate. This day was looking up. Xandie followed Priss into the bakery and collapsed on a chair in relief. She waved a hand in a bustling Lila’s direction. “That’s my cousin, Lila Harrow. She owns this bakery, ‘Heart’s Delight,’ and she makes a mean hot chocolate.”
The gnome slayer shuddered. “No thanks. Give me a full-bodied, saucy cappuccino any day.”
“And ladies, that’s why I’m the boss.” Lila placed a hot chocolate next to Xandie and a cappuccino in front of Priss, who sniffed the cup with her eyes closed before she savored the first sip. Lila snickered. “Coffee lover?”
“Since I was a teenager. Whenever I competed, I had an early start. Coffee was the only stimulant that kept me awake.”
“I figure since you carry that pig sticker it must mean you fence?” Lila nodded at the sword strapped to the other woman’s hip.
“My dad taught me. I don’t compete anymore, but I’m instructing at the academy.”
Xandie snorted. “Good luck on getting any of those kids to care. From what I’ve noticed, supernatural kids are spoiled as hell.”
Priss grimaced. “I’m finding that out, but I haven’t been here long though. I thought I’d try something different after my father died. Point Muse offered me a paying position. So here I am.” She stared down at her almost empty cappuccino.
Lila bounced up as the first of the morning trade trickled in. “Well, we’re glad to have you. Especially Xandie, you saved her from death by garden ornament.”
“Funny, Lila. Real funny.” Since solving her great-aunt’s murder, and her mother’s disappearance, she’d settled into the chaos of Harrow family life.
“You can see the family resemblance between all of you. The eyes and the same shade of brown hair. I take it you’re close to your cousin?”
“There are three of us cousins, the same age. I’ve only known Lila and Holly for a few months though. But it feels like I’ve gained two annoying sisters.”
“I can hear you,” Lila sang from behind the counter. She yelled over her shoulder for help and a grim-faced teenage girl with black and silver hair stomped out.
Xandie whispered to Priss. “Work experience. Es wanted to work with my other cousin, Holly, at the funeral home, but the school wouldn’t okay it. So, she’s stuck with Lila. Can anyone say dragon with attitude?”
“She’s a dragon?” Priss dropped her hand to her sword. Knuckles white, she turned her torso away from the teenager, shielding herself.
Wow, Priss looked like she’d sucked on a lemon. “Es Penne. She’s not too painful as teenagers or dragons go. The rest of the clan is snooty Point Muse high-society.” At least the dragons had backed off once she’d tracked down the killer knight who’d murdered several Point Muse residents. But they still hadn’t warmed to Xandie as librarian.
“My dad always said a good dragon was a quiet one. He meant dead, not silent, but in his mind it still applied.” Priss threw money on the table and shot Xandie a lukewarm smile. “I have to finish sword practice, but thanks for the coffee. I’ll see you sometime.” Priss waved as she strode out the door.
Lila wandered over and dumped a plate of Xandie’s favorite sweets, golden honey butter puffs, in front of her. “Did my coffee drive our new resident away?”
Xandie frowned. “She left pretty abruptly. As soon as she found out Es was a dragon, she dropped this weird comment about dead dragons and left.” Xandie grabbed a puff and nibbled, contemplating Priss Makepeace. She chewed and waited for the smooth sweetness overload but was met with a slagging taste of pure bitter salt. Xandie spat her puff out and gulped her hot chocolate.
Lila reared back, horrified. “What’s wrong? Butter puffs are your favorite.”
“I’m sorry, but it tasted bitter. I think you used salt instead of sugar.”
“That’s not possible. I know this recipe by heart. I know I used sugar.” Lila pushed he
r chair away and stood, looking wildly around the bakery.
People hunched over their plates, spitting food out. Table after table had the same reaction. Customers stood, shouting at Lila and Es as they tried to calm them down. People even shoved each other.
Xandie waded in to deal with the irate customers. She couldn’t help but think rampaging garden gnomes, spoiled food and a mysterious new resident weren’t the best portents for a calm trouble-free Point Muse.
Two
“My regulars hate me.” Lila hung her head in her hands.
“They don’t hate you. Although those women you hosed down might harbor ill will.” Xandie gaped at the chaos surrounding her. A tornado of furious customers had whirled through Lila’s beloved bakery. Overturned tables, food splattered everywhere. Plates broken into tiny pieces covered the floor like a crazed ceramic obstacle course.
“I don’t get it. Heart’s Delight is just that. I don’t do potions or spells, hexes or curses, like Elspeth used to. My witchiness goes into my cooking. The food’s supposed to enhance your mood, your confidence, help you focus on what’s good in your life and in yourself. Clarity of heart, mind and soul. That’s it. Instead, my customers tried to kill each other with coffee cups.” Lila groaned and lowered her head until her forehead landed with a thud on the last remaining upright table.